The concept of allowing and how it can change your life

allowing

The concept of allowing is a powerful life philosophy, used to advance success, happiness, and self-development. Allowing is about letting go of resistance and accepting things just as they are. When you stop controlling all aspects of your life, you avoid forcing things into unnatural paths and you allow yourself to experience (and learn) what is meant for you. Allowing gives you the opportunity to see situations and people, as they truly are. Regardless of whether allowing uncovers the reality you desire, you can be assured that it reveals the truth. The concept of allowing, for many, is the understanding and acceptance that life has put them exactly where they need to be.

“If it’s meant for you, you won’t have to beg for it…You will never have to sacrifice your dignity for your destiny.”

Why is allowing relevant to success?

The concept of allowing is often incorrectly conflated with apathy or laziness. This reasoning exposes a very unhealthy attitude to our own success. It rests on an innate fear that if we slow down or stop pushing so hard every day, our goals and everything we have worked for will come crashing down. This type of thinking shows a lack of belief in our own abilities. Why not think that your goals will find you just as much as you try to find them?

Allowing is an immensely difficult concept to practice, especially for the target driven, workers of today. However, allowing is premised on the idea that, regardless of your incessant hard work– if something’s not meant for you, it just won’t happen. Think about it – is feeling as though you have to make absolutely everything happen in your life sustainable? Success, for some, starts with a lucky strike and for others, appears once they have overcome a mountain. However, once people reach their success “peak”, they describe a path opening and things just, “falling together”.

This is the concept of allowing – success is not meant to be one giant uphill struggle – if things are meant to work in your favor, trusting that they will, puts an end to unnecessary suffering. An action is important but it must be balanced with your ability to allow.

Allowing and self-confidence

You cannot successfully practice the concept of allowing without self-confidence. This is because, typically when we want to control every aspect of something, we innately believe that without our control, it would escape us. The deeper aspect of allowing has to do with trusting in yourself and believing that what you want to create will become your reality.

How to practice allowing

The best-selling author of “Bring Your Wholeself To Work” and sought-after motivational keynote speaker, Mike Robbins explains that allowing, is truly an art, which often goes against our societal grain. Instead of believing that hard-work and tunnel vision will get you to your goals, allowing is about keeping an inner state of flexibility, ensuring that you are not so tightly bound to your visions that you impede other opportunities, more suited to your life path.

Mike Robbins suggests three ways you can incorporate the concept of allowing into your life;

1.Understand your relationship with allowing

Firstly, you must understand how you feel about the idea of allowing. Are you comfortable with exercising less control in important areas of your life? Do you feel comfortable with uncertainty? Do you have strong enough self-confidence to believe that the things you desire will become your reality? Tell yourself the truth about how you relate to allowing, and you will be able to implement it successfully. It is, after all, designed to help you grow into your true self.

2. Pay attention to your actions vs allowing

Asses this point in terms of your biggest goals, dreams, and aspirations. How much of your energy is focused on actions, and how much is focused on allowing? While both action and allowing are important, it’s likely you’re putting a disproportionate amount of attention on the action. Increasing your focus on allowing can be an incredibly effective way for you to understand whether your goals are right for you. Do they fit into your life naturally? Do they bring you happiness? This is often the missing piece in ascertaining whether your goals will, in turn, bring you fulfillment.

3. Create an allowing habit

This is a simple, daily practice where you put your attention on allowing: accepting things as they are; trusting things are working out as they are meant to and really believing it. Remember to be kind to yourself – there is no smooth path to reaching goals. Allowing is a lot easier to think than to genuinely believe and routinely practice. However, the more attention you put on allowing, the easier it gets to embody into your life.

 

15 affirmations that will immediately change your mindset

affirmation

We are an embodiment of our thoughts. Whilst external factors do have influence over what we think, how we construe those external factors, is the most important part of our thought process. I’ve written extensively on how failure has driven many to success, well, affirmations premise on the same principle – we can’t control what happens in our life but we can control our reaction to those circumstances, it’s all down to our thinking. Life truly stems from our thoughts – we are what we think and affirmations help us to craft the life we want.

Why affirmations offer so much value

Affirmations help to purify and clarify our thoughts so that we stay aligned with our internal values. Affirmations are very powerful and actually restructure the dynamic of our brains because they raise the level of positive hormones in our brain and create “positive thought” neurons (http://www.arlenetaylor.org/brain-care/953-affirmation). This process creates, new, positive thinking channels allowing us to permanently change the way in which we think, for the better.  The word affirmation comes from the Latin affirmare, originally meaning “to make steady, strengthen.

Why we should practice self-affirmation

Affirmations strengthen us by helping us to believe in the potential of an action we desire to manifest. By saying our dreams and aspirations aloud in our heads, we instantly feel empowered and reassured by our own words. This is because we actively discount other (conscious or unconscious) negative thoughts or doubts we have attached to our goals and we finally allow ourselves to truly believe our dreams can and will become a reality. Affirmations are proven methods of self-improvement, not only do they re-wire our brain, as discussed,  but they play a crucial role in crafting our future. Thinking positively and ultimately believing in yourself opens you to a world of opportunities, one that could easily be closed, with a more negative mindset.

15 of the most impactful affirmations

So, on days when you feel clouded or bogged down because things may not be going your way, here are the most impactful thought affirmations to help you instantly change your mindset, for the long-term;

1) I am superior to negative thoughts and ill-intentioned actions

2) My ability to conquer my challenges is limitless; my potential to succeed is infinite

3) I acknowledge my own self-worth; I have no need for external validation

4) I am confident and I can handle any obstacle thrown in front of me

5) I am calm, peaceful and want the best for everyone around me

6) I am right where I am meant to be in my life, I trust in my path

7) I am intelligent and capable of accomplishing anything I desire

8) My positive attitude, confidence and hard work naturally brings me to new opportunities

9) I am grateful for everything I have in my life

10) I always make other people feel important when I am around them

11) I accept people for who they are and believe they are doing their best

12) I attract success easily into my life

13) My thoughts are filled with positivity and my life is plentiful with prosperity

14) Though these times are difficult, they are only a short phase of life

15) Today, I wake up with strength in my heart and clarity in my mind

For more about affirmations and how they can benefit your life read this comprehensive blog here for affirmations for every area of life read here 

 

3 easy steps for instant motivation at work

Monday. 9am. You vs computer screen. Motivation = zero. You are most definitely not winning. The thing is, do you care? Maybe not in that moment. But, you will. Here are some tips to get yourself out of that slump and motivated.

3 Easy Steps

Step 1 – incentivise

Think about how great your weekend was. Think about how valuable it is to have a work-life balance. Think about how non-existent your work-life balance will become when you haven’t completed enough work for your upcoming deadline. Think about what will do once you have finished – that beer after work or that extra –  unstressed – hour you could spend with a loved one. Then, think about how the only useful thing you could be doing with your precious time whilst at work, is work.

Step 2 –  reason

Think about why you are at your computer. Yes, there might be a moralistic reason to your work but you also like your salary, don’t you? Imagine life without your salary. Then imagine life with your salary. It’s a quick and simple trick to get those fingers moving.

Step 3 – end game

This can go one of two ways. For this step to work you really do need to like your career. You have studied, trained and/or jumped through hoops of fire to get yourself where you are. If you are unhappy you need to admit this – feeling unmotivated through dissatisfaction with your career is your gut begging for honesty and cannot – unfortunately – be remedied by a self help guide you have googled on the internet. If this resonates with you then think thoroughly about whether a career change is best. Career coaches can bring you valuable clarity if you are unsure, for more information click here. For those of you happy in your career, focus on the end game. Your career has many steps and the only way to reach the next one is to keep your eyes on the prize. Just like your favourite athlete you need to adopt a winning mindset to bring home the gold, read more about this here. Don’t give your employer a reason to hire someone else over you.

Image curtesey of Vic on flickr Vic – flickr the image has not been amended.

By Leila Mezoughi

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